From time to time I have this interesting experience as a parent. I’ll be dropping a truth bomb on one of my kids when suddenly a voice inside my head says, “Are you listening to yourself? There’s a message here for you too.” That voice is the Holy Spirit, and He testifies of truth. And when the Spirit testifies to me that something I’m saying is true, I’m grateful. I appreciate the reassurance that I’m teaching my children correct principles. But sometimes this feeling, while enlightening, can be a little uncomfortable. It’s as if the Spirit is taking my proverbial pointed finger and turning at back on me, forcing me to evaluate myself and whether or not I am willing to practice what I preach.
I am currently teaching my daughter to drive. She’s been driving for about a month now, and
I’m starting to look for opportunities to help her step up her driving
game. The other day we went out at the
beginning of rush hour to run some errands.
While I normally try to not say much when my kids are driving (my son is
currently learning as well) and let them figure things out as much as possible
(if they were reading this I’m sure they would say this isn’t true, but I
really do try!). One thing they struggle
with is being assertive when changing lanes and having to cross traffic. It makes sense. A month ago our driving mantras were “take it
slow” and “be cautious”. Now that they’re
more experienced we’re suddenly saying things like “be more assertive” and “you’ll
never get to go if you don’t just go for it”!
On our recent afternoon errands run, we were pulling out of
a neighborhood onto a busy four lane road.
Becca needed to cross two lanes of traffic to turn left, and then
immediately get into the far right lane to make a right hand turn. I knew that I would need to help her navigate
the maneuver, unless I wanted to sit in that same spot until rush hour
ended. I explained that initially all we
needed to worry about was getting past the first two lanes of traffic and
stopping in the turn lane in the middle of the road. We accomplished that with relative ease and I
watched for a break in the traffic so that she could turn left. The moment came and I said, “Go now.” Slowly she started moving forward. In the distance I saw a car, but there was
still time for her to turn, so I urged, “Come on! Go now!”
Slowly she inched forward a bit more and stopped. I could see her anxiety building, “Mom, I can’t
go! There’s a car!” Of course, I responded, “If you had gone when
I told you to, you would have had plenty of time.” Finally we made the turn and I looked to see
if the right lane was clear for her to change lanes. “Okay, go now”. Again, she kind of started to move to the
right, but hesitated. “What are you
doing? Go!” I may or may not have started losing my cool
at this point. I could see the confusion
of the drivers around us as she, with turn signal blinking, continued straight down
the middle lane of the two lane road. If
it weren’t for the fluorescent “STUDENT DRIVER” magnets glowing from all sides our vehicle, I’m sure
we would have become the targets of many a crude gesture and flowery
language.
After a few moments of confusion, we made all of the
necessary crosses and turns and made it to our destination. We sat in the car outside a friend’s house
while she tried to explain to me why she hadn’t felt safe doing what I’d asked
her to do (There were cars coming! I
didn’t have time!), and I tried to explain to her why she needed to trust me
when I’m giving her instruction (Clearly I have a lot of driving experience and
am qualified to help you navigate!).
Do you see where this is going? Can you just guess at the “aha” moment I
started to have in that moment?
At that point my thoughts turned to Peter, who upon seeing
Jesus walking upon Sea of Galilee, stepped out of the boat and made his own
attempt at walking on water.
“And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on
water, to go to Jesus. But when he saw
the wind boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, saying,
Lord, save me.” (Matthew 14:29-30)
This story about Peter is stunning both in its miraculousness
and its relatability. Peter walked
on water. I mean, wow! But then the winds about him began to blow
and fear suddenly replaced his confidence in himself and in the Lord. He began to sink.
As I shared this thought with Becca, I explained; Jesus knew
what Peter was capable of with His help, and as long as Peter kept his focus on
the Lord, he was able to do what he previously would have thought
impossible. But when he turned his focus
to the wind and allowed fear to take over, he sank. In our little driving scenario, I am the
seasoned driving veteran. I know what
you can and cannot do. I also understand
that you’re scared, and that will cloud your judgement and make it hard, if not
impossible, to act. That’s why I needed
you to trust me when I told you it was safe to go. By not trusting me, you made the situation
worse and very possibly could have caused an accident.
And as I was saying all of those things, the Spirit was
saying to me, “Are you listening to yourself?
There’s a message here for you too.”
And mentally I replied, “Yes, I’m listening. I know that God is all knowing and
all-powerful, yet too often I let my fears, my worries, my concerns distract me
from trusting in Him. I will try to do
better. I will strive to ‘Trust in the
Lord with all [mine] heart; and lean not unto [mine] own understanding.’” (Proverbs 3:5)
Of course, the most beautiful part of Peter’s walking on
water story is when, as he cries out for help because he’s sinking, Jesus
immediately “stretched forth His hand, and caught him”. He knows that we will doubt at times and
begin to sink, but if, like Peter, we turn to Him to lift us out of our stormy
sea, He will immediately reach out to us and save us.
Who knew that teaching my kids to drive could provide me
with such profound learning experiences? Not me, but I’m grateful nonetheless.