Christmas Letter

We just recently mailed out our holiday letter. Being away from home over Christmas threw us off a bit. Due to the lateness of the letter, we didn't send it to everyone that we normally do, and we didn't have time to get addresses for new friends and family that we've added to our mailing list. I am posting it here, hoping that everyone who would like to read it will be able to do so. We love our friends and family and are so grateful to be able to stay in touch with all of you!

The holidays and the year have come to a close, but we have one last task to check off our list – send our annual letter and well wishes to our beloved family and friends. We hope you all felt the joy of the holiday season, enjoyed peace and happiness in 2010 and look forward to 2011 with hope and gladness!

Like all of you, we have had a busy year.

Jeremy is now in his third year of dental school which means that he spends less time in classrooms and more time in the clinic, which he loves! He enjoys the other students and staff in the clinic as well as his patients. Some days he actually feels like a dentist! In addition to his school work, Jeremy continues to do freelance proofreading and reviewing, and also continues to serve as the ward finance clerk.

Tricia enjoys having both kids in school and has become more involved in helping out in their classrooms and volunteering with the PTO. She helps Jeremy stay on top of his freelance work and does some of her own as well. Tricia was recently released from the stake Young Women’s presidency and is now serving in the ward Primary presidency. Both callings have proven to be challenging but fun!

It is often said of Becca that she is a miniature Tricia. She loves 2nd grade, has started singing in the Indianapolis Children’s Choir and continues to take dance lessons (jazz and tap this year). She is responsible and thoughtful and loves EVERYTHING!

If Becca is a miniature Tricia, then Isak is a miniature Jeremy. He has a fun sense of humor and makes us laugh all the time. He loves being in Kindergarten, but really can’t wait until 1st grade when he can be in school all day. Isak loves to read and will read just about anything he can get his hands on. He also enjoys going to taekwondo classes and playing video games.

We were especially fortunate this year to take a trip to Hawaii over the Christmas holiday. We were there for two weeks, spending 4 days on the island of Oahu and 10 days on the island of Molokai. We had a blast sightseeing, spending time with our friends who travelled with us, snorkeling and playing at the beach!

Those of you who know us well, though, will not be surprised to know that we were grateful to get back to the cool weather in Indianapolis! We loved so much about Hawaii, but not the weather. Well, except for Isak, who claims that he is a full-blooded Hawaiian and tells us every day that he wants to move there.

It was fun to come home from our trip and find cards and letters from so many of you! Thank you for keeping in touch! We send our love and wish you the best in 2011!

Whiner Nightmares

At about 4:00 this morning Isak came into our bedroom cyring. He'd had a nightmare. Typically when he has a bad dream he will come tell us, and maybe cry a little bit, but is easily calmed and will go back to bed.

This nightmare was different. He was near hysterics - crying, shaking and absolutely refusing to go back to his bed. I let him climb into bed with us and tried to comfort him. He calmed down a bit and after several minutes said, "Mom, do you know what a whiner is?"

"Yes"

"What is it?"

"A person who whines a lot." And, being confused about the randomness of this conversation asked, "Why?"

"Because there was a whiner in my nightmare. It was coming after me!" And then he burst into tears again.

So there you go. Whiners are SCARY!

I want my baby back, baby back, baby back

As Isak grew out of his clothes as a baby, we would box them up and take them out to Jeremy's parents' house to be stored and saved for Jer's brother, Jason and his wife, Megan. Jason and Megan have had two girls, and thus have not yet needed boy clothes. Recently Jer's parents have started redecorating their home and needed to empty out closets. They asked us if we would take the tubs of stored baby clothes off their hands. And so it is that I am hauling around about six tubs of baby boy clothes in the back of my van.

Today I decided to go through the clothes and see what is there and try to determine what to do with them. There's nothing like going through your kids' baby clothes to fill your heart with the joy of sweet memories and a longing for time to slow down just a little bit.

Isak turned six yesterday. I am simply amazed. I even asked him yesterday, "Isak, how can you be six when you've only been alive for like two years?!" He thinks I'm crazy. I think that time goes by too fast.

Thankfully he still snuggles with me (by the way, if you've read earlier posts about Isak, he loves me again) and doesn't complain too much when I smother him with kisses and call him "doodle bug". I can't imagine my life without this boy who is one of the greatest miracles of my life and who makes me laugh everyday.

In My Daughter's Eyes

Last week I went to Becca's classroom to be a "mystery reader". I showed up while the class was at lunch, and before they returned to the classroom, covered myself with a large sheet. The children were allowed to ask me "yes" or "no" questions to which I could respond by nodding my head. Once they figured out who I was, I took off the sheet and was prepared to read a couple of books to them.

However, before I started reading, the teacher asked me to tell the class about myself. "Hmmmm...what would twenty-two 7 & 8 year-olds be interested in knowing about me?" I wondered. I simply stated, "My name is Tricia Matis. I am Rebecca's mom. I also have a son named Isak who is 5. (thoughtful pause ) Ummm...do you have any questions for me?"

For a brief moment I thought, "Wow. This is depressing. I can't think of anything interesting to say about my life!" Then, a hand went up. "Yes," I aksed.

"What do you do?"

"Well, I'm a mom."

Another hand went up. "Um...I think she meant, what kind of work do you do?"

"Well, I work at home, as a mom," To which sweet Becca added, "She does a lot of work at home."

Then, Becca leaned over to me and said, "Tell them about the food you make."

"What?" I whispered back, confused.

"You know, the food that you make to take to people who need help."

"Oh."

And then I realized. I am more than the woman who cleans the house and does the laundry. I am more than the person who keeps everyone on schedule and makes sure that homework gets done. I am more than the chauffer who ensures that everyone is where they need to be.

I am a heroine. I comfort. I serve. I love. I take meals to people!

At least, I realized in that moment, that's what my daughter sees in me.

So, I turned to the class, with Becca smiling proudly at my side, and explained, "You see, because I am able to be a stay-at-home mom, and don't have to work outside the home, I have time to do things like prepare meals for people who are sick, have just had a baby or have lost a loved one."

I knew in that moment that I am being exactly the kind of mom I want to be. No, I'm not perfect, but in spite of my imperfections, my daughter is learning how heroic it is to be a mom who not only serves her family, but blesses the lives of those around her. I'm grateful for what she sees in me, for it inspires me to better - to measure up to what she sees in me.

A New Favorite

I am a huge fan of the movie Anne of Green Gables. In my post-mission, pre-marriage days, I had roomates who introduced me to the Anne movies. Whenever one of us was sick, or just having a really horrible day, we would have an Anne marathon.

There is some controversy over when this specifically happened, but around the time that Jeremy and I got married we found the Anne books in a little bookstore for not much money. I had never read the books and decided that I would like to. Jeremy bought them for me.

That was 11 1/2 years ago.

I don't know why I never actually read them. I started the first one and only got a couple of chapters in before I stopped. Every once in a while Jeremy would harrass me about not reading the books.

For Mothers' Day this year Jeremy got me the set of dvd's . It had been on my wishlist FOREVER and I was super excited. What is even more exciting is that I now have a daughter old enough to appreciate them with me. So the day after Becca broke her collar bone this past summer, when she was in a lot of pain and couldn't really do more than just sit, I asked her if she wanted to watch the first one. She LOVED it! Within 24 hours we had watched all 3 movies! I was in heaven.

That sparked my interest once again in reading the books.

Well, with the craziness of summer (kids at home, YW camp, pioneer trek...) I didn't get to read much, but finally, last night, I finished reading Anne of Green Gables.

The point of this post isn't to tell you a long, boring story about reading a book that I bought almost 12 years ago. The point is to share with you my new favorite quote. It inspired me to a feeling of gratitude for my life, that isn't exactly what I dreamed of, but suits me perfectly.

"...but if the path set before her feet was to be narrow she knew that flowers of quiet happiness would bloom along it. The joys of sincere work and worthy aspiration and congenial friendship were to be hers; nothing could rob her of her birthright of fancy or her ideal world of dreams. And there was always the bend in the road!"

"'God's in his heaven, all's right with the world,'" whispered Anne softly.

Like Anne, I am a dreamer. And though the dreams that I hold dear don't always come true in the way that I dream them, "flowers of quiet happiness" bloom along my path, "the joys of sincere work, and worthy aspiration and congenial friendship" are mine, and there always is a "bend in the road!"

Indeed, "God's in his heaven, all's right with the world."

Water Works

Those who know me really well know that I am very emotional. I cry at the drop of hat, often for reasons that I can't really explain. Often it seems that the situation doesn't warrant my extreme reaction. For example...

Recently I went to see Wicked with my mom and sister. This was my third time seeing Wicked on the stage and probably my bazillionth time hearing the song Defying Gravity. I cry almost every time, if not every time, that I hear that song. I can't control it. I'm listening to the song, singing along and BOOM - my throat starts constricting, my voice cracks and on go the water works.

So, I was sitting in the theatre in Louisville, watching the most outstanding performance of Defying Gravity that I have seen, and the process began - throat constricting, tears flowing. And this time it wasn't pretty. I knew that if I let it out it could very well be a distraction to the people sitting around me, so I tried to control the emotion I was feeling. Suddenly my body could no longer contain the emotion it was feeling and my whole body shuddered and some strange noise emitted from my throat that probably sounded something like a grunt. How embarrassing!!!

As the first act ended and the lights came on, I was grateful to see that Jill had also been crying (I can usually count on her to "get" why something affects me that way that it does). Even so, I felt a little goofy knowing that a song that I've heard so many times nearly made me come completely unglued!

Such unexplained drainages of my tear ducts happen on a regualar basis. Last night I was at the dance studio where my daughter takes ballet. I dropped her off and made my way down the hallway to the waiting room. As I walked by one of the classrooms I noticed a class that was in session. It was a class of preschool aged girls preparing for their upcoming recital. Kneeling next to each little girl, holding a hand up to support her as she twirled, was who I could only assume was her dad. It was by far one of the sweetest things I have ever seen. On went the water works.

A little later, I was invited along with all of the other parents, to go into Becca's class to watch them perform their recital piece. It is a ballet class, and they are doing a sweet little dance to Goodnight My Angel by Billy Joel. Well, at least I know my tear glands are working poperly! Maybe I'd better take a box of Kleenex to the recital and sit in the back by myself!

Another Funny Isak Conversation

I don't know, maybe you have to know Isak to find this funny, but I laughed...a lot. One thing that you have to know is that Isak proclaims, on pretty much a daily basis, that he does not love me.

Last night, at bedtime, Isak came into the living room and asked me, "Will you get me a sippy cup of water to take to bed with me?"

Thinking that I had found an opportunity to trick him into saying that he loves me, I said, "Maybe. Do you love me?"

He thought for a moment, "Ummmmmmmmm......yes."

But then, as I was internally congratulating myself for having extracted his confession of love for me, he said, "Well, not really."

"Oh" I said, "I may not get you a drink then."

And then he spoke the truth that I have so carefully tried to teach my children. "Yes you will, because YOU love me."

In my mind I thought, "Yes. You are right, little dude. Even if you won't tell me that you love me, I will always try to let you know in every way I can that I love you unconditionally - I'm so glad that you are confident in my love for you."

But, so as not to bore him with my long-winded response (remember the "blah blah blah" conversation?) I simply said, "That's true. I DO love you."

To which he replied, "Well, you freak ME out!"

"Well" I said, laughing, "you freak ME out!"

Then came his retort, which caused us both to laugh uncontrollably, "Well, you freak DAD out!"

Oh, so many truths spoken in one short conversation from the mouth of my 5 year-old.